


He Used To Be Mine

by AnotherLoser



Series: growing up, it made me numb [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Addiction, Codependency, Depression, Drug Addiction, Dysfunctional Relationships, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Peter is almost 21, Substance Abuse, not beta read we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:28:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27084877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherLoser/pseuds/AnotherLoser
Summary: “Not now, Friday.”“ I believe now is the perfect time, Peter. ”  She insists.  “ Your body has been through a trauma, your condition should be monitored before you leave. ”“Says who?”“ Your friend, I’ve been told. ”  That makes him pause.“Tony?”“ Harry Osborn. ”
Relationships: Harry Osborn & Peter Parker, Harry Osborn/Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: growing up, it made me numb [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1069584
Comments: 4
Kudos: 54





	1. Chapter 1

Hospital beeping. It’s a familiar sound, but it isn’t right anymore. And it specifically isn’t right for Peter.

Harry hasn’t left his side since the crash and burn. The first time he couldn’t wake Peter up. The first time he wasn’t just passed out. Peter never crashed like that before. He could handle so many things no human should, it was obvious to Harry what was going on by now as it had been for some time. Peter didn’t have limits like everyone else did. His heart was more forgiving, his body more resilient, and no matter what he thought about himself there was no denying his will to continue forward. People needed him, after all. For the same reasons this should have never happened; he was built differently than them, down to the genetic level.

Harry never questions his injuries with serious connotations. Nor the disappearing acts or healing rate or wild consumption of drugs.

Peter Parker wasn’t entirely human. So how did he end up gagging on his own vomit in Harry’s living room? Their shared one, he supposed, though that hadn’t fully sunken in just yet. Certainly not when the first weekend after the move ended like this.

Harry drove faster than the ambulance would have. He dragged his friend to the toilet to help him empty his stomach and then carried him into the car, the music still going and guests left in partial confusion. No waiting on anything but the elevator down to the lobby, and then he drove.

They haven’t been there long was the problem. Nothing the doctor’s did seemed to effect his body at all, and in the middle of their attempts Peter had been waking up, causing such a scene Harry heard it from the hallway he was left in. Confused clamoring, his friend's panic, something about restraints. Whatever the specifics were to Peter's genetic mutation, it became more obvious by the minute that this wasn't where Harry should have brought him.

He would likely have to talk to the police soon as well due to the drugs involved- if there was any evidence beyond what he explained to the staff when rushing in. Who knew how much was left in the bloodstream. Maybe Harry was the only one who looked like an addict here. Or maybe they already had their proof now that the room was quiet and they'd find out how fast he processed it too.

Harry was not a very smart man under stress.

Then again, he did the right thing for normal people. Maybe he was dumbest when he was sober, when they could have had coherent discussions about that elephant in the room and prepared for this. If they talked about that though, they'd probably have to talk about everything.

He considers another move at this time. Feet tapping, skin clammy, Peter restrained and sedated with an ungodly amount of drugs two feet from him. Even the nurse who informed him he could come into the room was clearly confused and concerned at the pace everything has unfolded. There wouldn’t be much time before he had to start answering questions, lest the staff start running tests in search for answers themselves. Right?

That was why he had Peter’s phone.

Time was a blur, potentially because of the drugs but most likely because of the stress given how sobering adrenaline could be. Or maybe it was both; his hands haven’t stopped shaking since he dragged Peter to the bathroom originally, filled with restlessness and lingering panic regardless of if he was in the hall with no information or watching his friend’s sleeping face. All is to say, Harry was at a loss as to how much time has passed between shakily dialing Tony Stark’s number and the man bursting into the hospital room.

The public - Harry included - never sees the man without a designer suit fitted to the man perfectly, hair styled, sunglasses on most of the time. Today he marches in wearing dress pants, sneakers, a tank top and an open button up. Probably the first things he could grab on his way out the door. His face appeared the way Harry felt; Confused, scared, maybe even guilty.

"What happened?" His voice shakes. Tony Stark, Iron Man himself, was either so full of concern or fear or both that he couldn't compose himself because Peter Parker was in the hospital. Peter interned for the man in high school, he said. There used to be a fair amount of news about their hero personas working together. They must have been close in some shape or form.

"I don't know." Tony's gaze snaps to him so quickly, so sharply that Harry flinches. "A party. He moved in with me, we had people over, but this shouldn't have happened- this doesn't happen with him. He's different. He can take three times as much as anyone else for the same high and the same recovery, and we both know why." There's realization on Tony's face by now, but he doesn't falter. Harry wets his lips. "So I don't understand this, I-I don't know what was different this time."

"He's still fucking human, god dammit." Tony all but snarls at him. "What did he tell you about it, huh? He's indestructible? Superhuman? Because he isn't. If he's hurt he has just as much chance of dying as any of us! Just because his-“ he catches himself there, the first pause, paired with a nervous glance towards the open doorway. Quickly Tony shuts them in, lowers his voice and takes a step closer. “He’s tougher, he heals fast, but a stab wound is a stab wound and a drug overdose is what? Still a fucking drug overdose!”

It stings in a way that makes Harry tense. That makes the guilt second to the defensive irritation he feels. Gritting his teeth, the younger man meets the other’s gaze with defiance even as he responds, “help him. Clearly they don’t know what he is yet or else he’d probably be under some kind of lockdown by now, but they’re going to figure it out if he stays here much longer—”

“What do you mean? What did they tell you?”

“Nothing. I don’t think they have anything to tell me besides that he’s not actively dying anymore.” A pause. “They barely did anything before he woke up. I think his faster... Everything is doing more than the hospital but they want to monitor and test and all that shit before they release him, probably not into my care either.”

“Oh and I’m supposed to sweep him out of here with my name? Don’t you have daddy’s credit card to bribe your way out?”

“Your name is better than money, and I bet you have a facility to make sure he recovers too. Or don’t you care anymore, Stark?”

[...]

It’s too quiet here. He shouldn’t be so trapped with his head first thing in the morning. There should be neighbors leaving for work, shutting their doors just a little too hard. Or Harry’s breathing by his ear, murmuring in his sleep, music no one bothered to turn off from the night before still running somewhere. The facility was dead silent. The bed wasn't warm. It wasn't dark, it wasn't his or anything like it. It wasn't much different from being in the hospital at all, but he knows that isn’t it because of the silence.

All this goddamn silence.

Peter flings himself out of bed, rips off anything attached to him, ignores the beeping he sets off and marches towards the door in nothing more than a hospital gown. Tony hunted him down at least once, he could do it again if he felt so strongly about it. Peter knew his way around the place no matter how long it’s been since his last time training in the facility. Upgrades weren’t that common since it was officially built all those years ago. Besides, there were cameras everywhere. If it was so important he stayed, someone was watching, and they could at least try to stop him, but they don’t.

“ _Mr. Parker._ ”

F.R.I.D.A.Y. Wasn’t exactly someone though, he supposed, now that he’s been called out.

“Not now, Friday.”

“ _I believe now is the perfect time, Peter._ ” She insists. “ _Your body has been through a trauma, your condition should be monitored before you leave._ ”

“Says who?”

“ _Your friend, I’ve been told._ ” That makes him pause.

“Tony?”

“ _Harry Osborn._ ”

“Harry was here?”

“ _Harry was the one who called Tony. It’s my understanding he had taken you to the emergency room first and changed his mind later. Something about not wanting you to become a science experiment._ ”

Peter sighs. “Oh yeah? So he called Tony and got me here because that’s so much better.”

“ _It seems he used your phone to do it, according to Tony’s records._ ” She pauses, and he dares to take another step before he’s stopped again. “ _You could be worse off than to be cared for here. Tony didn’t want to infringe on your privacy, hence the private room, never mind cut you open._ ”

“...I have to go home, Friday.”

“ _Peter?_ ”

“Yeah, Friday?”

“ _Be careful._ ”

“Always am.”

[...]

Harry wasn’t home when Peter got there. As a result, the apartment was just as bad as the medical facility; empty, quiet, sterile. Even covered in leftover trash, bottles, spilled alcohol and what smelled like vomit sitting somewhere- probably on the bathroom floor or the like. It was a ghost town to Peter, like no one could have stepped foot inside for years. It was only lively when it was the two of them. That’s why Harry didn’t want to live alone- he wanted life. He wanted change and companionship and freedom. He rarely even implied it, but Peter knows. He’s always known.

Just like everything else they don’t say to each other, the presence of Peter in his life was the most refreshing thing Harry ever had. And Harry was the only thing that made Peter feel loved and accepted since he lost May.

Nothing was the same after that day. Not just because of her absence, because of what it did to Peter’s heart.

His friends reminded him of her, of his responsibility to protect as many as he could. And he failed her, just like he failed Ben, and would fail MJ and Ned and anyone else.

Everyone else.

Everyone but Harry, who only needed him to exist in the same room to be satisfied. It was impossible to fail someone even more pessimistic about people than he was.

Then again, if his life intertwined with Harry’s was all he needed to do, what happened if he died?

He doesn’t want to think about it. But he has to, doesn’t he? Being accountable was the bottom line of all of it; saving people, helping people, growing this relationship. It’s easy when it’s strangers looking at his mask and all he has to do is be there when he hears commotion. It’s harder to recognize what he was doing as Peter Parker rather than Spider-Man. Maybe that’s why Tony didn’t hide his identity.

He’s sitting on the bed, staring at his bare feet when his roommate comes home. For once Peter didn’t hear the front door- wasn’t paying enough attention to notice anything until Harry was five feet away from him.

“Peter.” he chokes out. “Jesus Christ, Pete—!” He sounds like he’s about to cry. He looked like it too, the mutant realizes in the last second before his friend was burying his face in his chest.

Hesitantly - more so than he ever was with him before - he sets a hand on Harry’s head, fingers entangling in greasy hair.

“I wanted to stay, I promise! I wanted to be there, but they said I shouldn’t and my dad kept trying to get ahold of me and I- I was coming back to check on you, I swear.”

In this instance, he was speechless, but he tries. “It’s okay, Harry… I know… I was supposed to stay too.” The blonde’s head jerks up so fast it makes him flinch.

“What? You broke out?”

“I-” he felt right in it, at least to an extent before. Now it felt like a crime. “I didn’t want to see him. I didn’t want…” his own throat was tightening now too. Were they really holding so much back before? Did it have to be such a shock that Harry cared?

“I’m so sorry.”


	2. Chapter 2

This is what he brought on himself. All of it- at least to an extent. Harry doesn't want him to be so harsh. Peter is sick of being disillusioned. Excusing things. Excusing himself. Bullshitting his way through college and crime fighting and his entire goddamn existence. He drove himself into the ground with his work load and got stuck under the surface with his coping mechanisms. Peter might recover physically better than most in his position but that doesn't mean it couldn't kill him or get him killed otherwise. Something was bound to go wrong and it did, it was, and no matter what a counselor might say about the position he was in he still knew it was his fault. No one forced him into it. No one shoved the drugs in his face or waved around the suit taunting him. Peter is what he himself created.

All he can say now is that he was trying to try. He wasn't ready to call it what it was, even if he knew deep down, even if they both did. Harry hated the word anyway. But at least they could acknowledge some of the other elephants that have been stinking up their living room.

Who Peter was, for started. Why Harry liked to call him when there was space in his bed. Why Peter always came running. That doesn't mean much has changed, of course. It just means that now they talked about it. Maybe eventually they'd even get into how she died, or Peter's old nickname and why hearing it now makes him wince. What happened with MJ, when Harry finally gave up on his father, what he planned to do with his future or any number of details from their lives they had always glazed over for the sake of temporary comfort over actual growth.

Train-wrecks, the both of them. Which is why all that they can do for now is talk.

Harry isn't the only person that Peter needs to work on things with though. In fact, he could probably make a small list of names to track down again instead of only the one. Right now he just wanted to deal with the things currently weighing on his conscience.

That's why it was Stark Industries and not another apartment where he'd feel less anxiety.

His hair was still greasy. His feet tap restlessly even in the elevator when Tony has allowed him up. His fingernails were chewed short instead of trimmed and his clothes were still draped over his body instead of properly fitting. Showing up was all the effort he had in him at the moment, so he came, but he didn't prepare himself very well.

When the bell _dings_ he jumps, taking in a sharp breath as the doors open.

"Didn't think I'd see you so soon." He expected F.R.I.D.A.Y. to greet him first, not Tony. His finger's curl into his palms, and he steps cautiously further into the room.

"It's been like three weeks.." He comments idly. "I guess that's fair though." Tony nods.

"You still look like shit." Harsher than he used to be when they were in regular communication. No lightness to his voice, not a casually worded way of checking up on him, just a blunt statement. "So what do you need?"

He doesn't belong here anymore. Should he have come at all? Tony came through, that was the point. Tony came through and so Peter should thank him and hear him out on the plethora of opinions he probably had on the matter. If Tony doesn't want to see him though? If it's too late? Even if that wasn't the case, what was the point? He cut ties, makes his own tech, manages his time just fine for someone barely keeping afloat. Peter was far from being an Avenger, let alone having that relationship with Tony again.

He only just got here and he already wanted to turn tail and run.

"Nothing." He pauses, quickly wetting chapped lips. "I needed to thank you. For getting me out of the hospital and taking care of me." It feels like a _confession_ , sour on his tongue. Soft brown eyes dart away, scanning over the room rather than continuing to look at his old mentor’s face. He hasn’t been in this office in ages it felt like. Just a few years but look how much Peter changed in that time. Though, to be fair, there wasn’t much to say about an office sitting room. The furniture was the same, as was the color pallets. Photos may be different but there weren’t many to begin with and the most of them were probably on Tony’s desk, facing the other way.

Tony hadn’t aged drastically, just as Peter noted the last time they spoke. He dressed just as sharp. Hair done like he was ready for a photo shoot but really because there was just always a chance for a number of cameras to pop out at him.

Peter has never felt more out of place here. Not even as a fifteen-year-old kid.

“You’re welcome.” Peter blinks. He didn’t sound quite so stern that time. “It didn’t have to come to that though.”

“Yes it did.”

Tony’s eyebrows raise. “That so? Nothing could have gotten you here sooner? Nothing anybody said or did?”

“No.” He’s prodding and he’s not even trying to hide it. He wants to know Peter is serious, that he’s learned his lesson and wants to change. It needs to be more. “I wouldn’t have listened to anyone. Just like you wouldn’t when you were my age, right?”

“Right.” Was that fondness? Knowing? Of course he knew but what was he letting show? That was the important part. “Peter.” The young man blinks. "Why are you here?"

He finally turns to look at the other again, taking in that gentle look on his face for the first time in ages. "I told you..."

"Yeah and I'm glad you're grateful. But I think we both know you've had a lot of shit going on for a long time now and you never felt the need to swing by an Avenger's house when they saved your ass as Spider-Man. So why does this one matter? And why me? Why not any of your high school buddies who you might owe an apology?"

Tony was the kind of genius who, despite being a good judge of character, being able to read people, lacked some social graces. He was known to be _eccentric_ long before Iron Man entered the picture. But today, it seems, he's getting everything right. Like Peter's outer walls were nothing but cellophane to him.

"You're the only one who gets it. And you..." He hesitates, swallows, tries his best not to chicken out and look away. "Our relationship meant so much to me. After- I don't even remember my parents, and then I watched my uncle die and I was so worried about May being _okay_ I wasn't even thinking about my life and how to live it to make her proud but you... Believed in me, and invested in me, and I could look up to you and it wasn't just like idol worship, you were there, supporting me and I just... I let everybody down, Tony. When MJ came to see me a little while ago I basically just laughed in her face, I don't remember the last conversation I had with Ned... May would be _fucking horrified_ if she saw me now."

His eyes are welling up, voice beginning to crack. Tony makes a sound like he was forcing his throat to clear.

"Do you need help? You need rehab? I can pay." His hands land on Peter's shoulders, fingers curling just enough to give him a quick squeeze. "Whatever you need, Pete."

"No, I don't- I don't know what I need anymore. And Harry gets where I am now but he doesn't want to be clean, I know he doesn't so how can I..."

"Hey, stop that." He does. His mouth shuts with a _clack_. "I know I misjudged him partially, he came through for you in a crisis but anybody who holds you back from getting well doesn't deserve you. I'm beyond serious about that, Peter. You deserve to be well."

A few tears have fallen already. He's choking up now, but he doesn't make a sound until Tony pulls him in for a hug.

**Author's Note:**

> Finale? I kind of think so, though I might add another chapter to this one to give some closure with Tony.


End file.
